Things they are a changin. New and frightening changes. Last Tuesday began as any day might. Routine and familiar. Around lunchtime we moved to the kitchen area and were sitting quietly, watching the street activity. Suddenly, without provocation or cause, RD began to stomp on my foot. He kicked me between the legs, grabbed my arms and twisted. The look on his face was something out of a movie scene.
The following day we are sitting in his doctor's office. Tears roll down my cheeks as I describe my husband's behavior. Why do I feel embarrassed and bewildered at the same time? I have NO skills in managing this behavior and it came out of nowhere. I don't know if it's a one time event or a new and permanent behavior.
RD's doctor listens (as he always does) and prescribes an antipsychotic medication. Just hearing the word "antipsychotic" knocks me for a loop. A very scary word, this is.
After we arrive home, I go to the computer in search of more information about the drug prescribed. I don't feel comfortable with what I'm reading. Information is not the same as knowledge. I can get endless information from computer searches but I obviously lack "knowledge" about medications. I am neither a pharmacist nor connected in any way to the medical field. Recognizing the frustration a medical professional must feel when patients or family members try second guessing his/her decision, I approach the doctor with some dread. Will he brush me off, get exasperated with the 'butting in"? It turns out, he welcomes my questions and concerns and is willing to prescribe the medication I request. I'm SO happy he's open to the possibility of sharing information and decision-making.
It's been a mere three days since I've started the new medication but already I can see changes and all are positive. This will sustain us until we need to make another change.
P. Jo Ann.